I'm sorry it has been so long since I've posted an update. Elijah continues to thrive here in sunny SoCal (he's even getting a little bit of a tan). His comfort level and that of our family continues to grow each day. As I know is true for most, each day that goes by we forget a little bit more that he was not a physical part of this family at one time. It seems more and more natural all the time.
He's progressing well on most fronts. His attachment with Sara is developing extremely well. He loves the physical contact from her, wanting to be held and hugged. Naptime and bedtime are going smoothly as well. Not surprisingly, things have slipped in his attachment to me though. Spending all that time in Russia with him 24/7, things were going really well for my attachment with him. But now that we are back to life here, it has been back to work for me and away from the family for a good chunk of the day. I am out the door before anyone is up, and even though I am home pretty much every day when he gets up from his afternoon nap and around for the remainder of the day, I have seen very clearly this past week that it hasn't been enough. We have started to institute some mandatory holding time for the two of us because he just doesn't want the physical closeness from me that he wants from Sara. And not that it has to be the exact same, but he still a bit wary when I pick him up or hold him. The first day was a pretty good struggle, but it only lasted about 10 minutes and he settled down. Next day was a little bit better than that.
None of this comes as a surprise to us. It is just amazing to me how subtle it all is, and how far below the surface so many things are with Elijah. I am finding that it is easy to get comfortable and to let up a little. But he is constantly reminding us that there is still so much work to be done. And even though on the outside he appears to be very happy and content, fostering the kind of bonds and attachments that we want for him in our family is going to take a lot of hard work and a lot of time. I am reminded of this verse...
"And as for you, brothers, never tire of doing what is right". (2 Thessalonians 3:13)
JP
JP
1 comment:
That verse is perfect and exactly the one that has been impressed upon my heart lately. All of what you have written is so true... we have been discovering the same. Thank you for sharing your heart. It's good to read an update from you guys!
In Christ,
Lyn (and Dennis)
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