Why am I Sad?

Last night we sat down with our older three boys and had an open discussion about areas that we need to work on in our lives, and one of the areas for one of the boys was to be more patient and understanding with Elijah. Trying to sift through the broad spectrum of emotions that a single day creates proves daunting to experienced adults; so the fact that the boys do as well as they do given their age is amazing as it is. I am constantly challenged and inspired by their attitude and persistence. This morning a friend and I were talking about sadness, and as I searched my heart for something I was truly sad about in my life, I was brought back to last night's discussion. I realized that the only thing that truly makes me sad related to my life is when I think about Elijah's first six months of life. We see the effects of that first six months every single day, and it is truly sad that even after nearly 4 years in our family, he still has trouble trusting. He still has trouble loving.

But as I was discussing this with my friend, a realization poured over me. Playing the odds, if Elijah had not been abandoned he probably never would have come to know the Lord. It is because of his suffering that his ultimate redemption is realized. Why am I sad? I should be rejoicing. I know this is a realization that I have had before, but never in the context of my own feelings about the situation. Praise God that he sees the beginning, the middle, and the end. May we always greet the sadness of today with the joy of tomorrow...

JP