Daisies and Roses…and then some

I sit here at the end of our third day with Misha, a little fussing in the background as Sara rocks Elijah to sleep and we sweat it out with no AC in the room, the window shut to keep it quiet in a day that topped at about 90 degrees with humidity. Snow flurries last week, 90 degrees with humidity this week. I guess that’s Siberia for you?

Each day has brought both promise in our new life with Misha and anxiousness to get home. We pick up Misha’s passport tomorrow, and fly out on Wednesday morning early for what seems like a pointless week in Moscow (we met a family here that will only have to be in Moscow for two days). And not a day too soon. After what has ended up seeming like an eternal party on the streets of Krasnoyarsk, culminating in a fireworks display outside our hotel window that woke us up at 11:30 at night (seeing as it’s not dark until then), we are ready for a little more peace and quiet. It seems like the fun (and the alcohol consumption) never sleeps here in Krasnoyarsk.

Three days have given us a pretty good initial read on the personality of little Elijah. He continues to be wonderful, sweet little boy with the most adorable expressions (they’re hard to catch on camera, but as soon as I have one I’ll post it). But it hasn’t been all daisies and roses, as we knew and expected from the beginning (and as the fussing that has turned to screaming behind me will attest to). He started testing his boundaries from day one, seeing what was ok and what was “niet”, often using his cute little expressions to stretch the boundary just a little farther. What he doesn’t know is that we’ve done this three times already, and we’ve seen it all. The cards are stacked against you little man (or malinky mushena as we loosely translate it into Russian).

But we’ve given him a pretty big learning curve, and due to the past 2 ½ years of his life we are focusing heavily on developing attachment with us and trust. And I’m happy to say that we are making wonderful progress. Today we had two milestones. One, he gave both of us our first kisses. It was wonderful! We had been practicing on Curious George for the past two days. He would kiss George, George would kiss us, and we would kiss him (I don’t think George minded this game all that much, but mommy knows where George has been for the last 2 ½ weeks and tries not to think about it).

Second, he bumped his head against the wall, and for the first time he came running to me crying for me to comfort him (I had to balance my concern for him with my joy in his response, but I knew he was going to live). This is a pretty common problem with institutionalized children that have had to self-soothe their whole life. That he recognizes us as here to take care of him and able to comfort him when he is hurt is huge, and it has only been three days! This is truly wonderful!

We have a long way to go and a lot to learn, but a few things are for sure. We love him with all our hearts and we will not stop loving him, no matter how hard it might get or how long it might take. And as the crying has stopped behind me and I hear the soft voice of Sara singing “Jesus loves me”, I am again reminded what it is all about. “Yes, Jesus loves me.” No matter how much I fight against him, or how patient he has to be with me he still loves me the same. Why would I do any less for my son?,.,,,

JP